Friday, June 12, 2009

A couple with relationship difficulties



Kristine asks about a couple with two young children she knows who she knows who are having relationship difficulties. She says, "The woman is a free spirit and wants to pursue an "open" relationship, and he is crushed by this and doesn't know if he should accept this or not. I have heard both sides and offered no bias or judgment. But I am wondering about this in general. What about open relationships or the need to be physically intimate with another? I would love to hear what you have to say about this.


As you very well know the rules and regulations that are created in your society often clash against the spiritual growth of beings, promises made to last lifetimes, years.

When two beings grow and change, it is often very difficult to fulfill. Yes, there are those that are very meant to be together for a long time and those that are meant to be for a small time.

When the promises are completed, there is a need to move forward. Often if another being is forced to be with another there is much a state of no growth can occur. Thus, an unhealthy relationship. It does not mean that these two cannot be together if they choose, if they talk, if they can find that again.

This young woman queries as to her state of not loving, an evolved being capable of loving many. In many ways, she is trying to spark something deep within him that she feels has gone missing.

You're talking about the mother in this family?

Yes. She seeks for him to come back to her. That being who was so full of life, and not so accountable for everything. It is interesting that Kristine called her a free spirit; she used to call him that. And so she looks now to both men and women. She seeks to find at something at this point. It seems physical, but in truth, it is more then that. Often when there is something out of balance it might show up as a sexual desire, but it is only the body’s way to try to push into a speaking place, a place of discernment, a place to actually stop and take account of what is going on here. She seeks to find that intimacy again.

She will not find it in that way, but she does not know that. He will not find it by being afraid. He is looking away instead of at her. He is making demands and rules instead of realizing that this would never to do for her. He needs to sweep her off her feet again, but he has forgotten how.

It is difficult when there are other beings that they love dearly and they have put their importance over theirs, which is not unheard of, of course. They are important and love is abundant for them. But to find it for themselves.

Are you referring to the children here?

Yes, for the parents to find it for themselves is the most important thing now. It can be done, but both must be willing. You see, when there is more than one promise at hand, it is difficult to help. I can only give them the information that it can be done.

And if you were going to address this with another situation, might the answer be very different, the answer?.