Leaving a draining relationship for her own survival

I have a comment hear from a woman named Wendy. She says the messages on our blog have been very helpful to her. She asks if she should leave her boyfriend who has drug problems. She says she feels drained by his life. She doesn’t know if she’s here to learn through this. She wants to know if we’re all here to suffer, to absorb a lesson, or can we choose to enjoy being physical and being happy. She wants to know if she will ever be happy.

Blessed one, know that your thoughts of leaving is the element of free will, of choice within you. Survival. Know that you are now feeling a need to remove your being, to protect it, for you are being overwhelmed by the situation. And you see in it a state of “no growth.” But he continues to stay in place and not move forward. Not only is it the abuse of his being, but his lack of clarity and choices and forward movement that concerns you.

You feel as if you are standing with your feet in cement, when your heart is yearning to be amongst the stars. Blessed one, pain is part of the physical world. It is important to feel it, yes. It is important to understand and listen to what it is speaking to you? Yes. You must do what the voice from within speaks to you. You are trying to deny it for you want very much the stability of a relationship and the warm companionship that it provides. Trust, my dearest one that you need to make choices for you. Then perhaps he will make choices for himself that will make the two of you grow. But it is most important at this time to concentrate on your own growth, for you are in a state that is very unhealthy for you. You know this. You are concerned about it.

You are a wise being. Life’s passages are not about suffering; they are about growing. In there of course there must be some pain, but there can be the great joys, highs and lows, swings of good and bad—and both are good. If you understand this about growth you will see it not as a long path of suffering but as many opportunities to grow. And blessedly you shall do a lot of it.

Thank you.