Monday, August 25, 2008
A young woman alone with her baby needs help
Katherine has asked about her situation. She has a new baby and her boyfriend has not taken any responsibility even though he said he wanted to be involved. She is sad and lonely and feels unable to move forward. She is concerned about how to be a good mother and is waiting for her boyfriend to participate but he does not seem interested. She is confused and depressed and fearful of being alone. What can she do to move forward.
She is a blessed being, a beautiful being, filled with love, and does feel very alone right now. Firstly, little one, let me tell you there is not a single mother that does not feel alone. Each mother for the first time holding her child will feel as if there is no one there to help, to give her the perfect answers for all things. But with stillness, and great love…in other words, dear, don't’ hurry past what you need to do for yourself and your child. Be singular in your thoughts of this now. I know the complexities of the life in which you walk are vast at this time, but do not take on the whole world. Take on the moment. As if to say to you, take small steps, or baby steps. This is very important, to not overwhelm yourself with the whole of the situation.
Be who you are. A beautiful being, filled with love, wanting only to help yourself and this child to move forward.
Take deep breaths. Be in the moment. Hear yourself and your thoughts. Make sure your thoughts are nurturing and healing for yourself and your child. If they are not--if you are feeling negative or destructive--then you must choose help for yourself. And there are beings that will gladly help you, my dear. You need to put a voice to these thoughts. No one is going to take your child away from you. They want to help you, and it can be. You’ll find yourself I a situation where many seem as if they are not willing to help you. Dearest one, in truth you’re fearful of helping yourself; you’re fearful of loss, fearful of losing.
In many ways you might think that this is what has brought you to this place, but do not put yourself in a state of blame right now. Put yourself in a state of empowerment. You know what is right for yourself and your child. And you will make choices clearly each moment as they arise. You do not need to take on the world.
As for the father, he must make his choice. He truly doesn’t understand who he is or where he is at this time. I know there are responsibilities that he must stand up to, and hopefully will in time. But there are also ways in which others can help him to do this. Seek help for yourself, for your child, and for him.
As to your situation at home, this too can be helped. There are wonderful beings that will help you but you must find strength in your voice to speak out and ask. Dearest one, have you never heard of “what you ask you shall be given?” For this is truth. If you love your being enough to ask for help, not only from the physical world, but also from spirit, it shall be there for you. I know your reaching out in this question is such a way. It is there for your dearest. There are many who want to help you. You are surrounded with great light and great love. You’re a very intuitive being, and often times you hear other people’s needs. Try to concentrate on your own right now, and your child’s.
Thank you.
Tell her that she is loved and she is not alone.
I will do that. The help that you are talking about, would this be from friends and family, or would this be from some social services organization?
She must begin by talking of her need to all. And they will help her find the steps to be taken. It is very important to use the tools of being human in a physical lifetime—a voice, a heart, a need. These are tools with which you learn in your physical lifetime. It doesn't help to keep it all hidden, and this child so close to her heart that she becomes so overwhelmed that she becomes destructive to her own being and to her child. She does not want this. Tell her to be not afraid to speak. And it shall come to her.
I know that the young woman wants this man to simply come back and take care of her. But that is not her promise.
She asks what happened, why he is not interested when he seemed to want to be involved?
In truth he does want to be involved but he is as overwhelmed as she is, and he does not understand what he does at this time. He understands very well what it is like to not feel loved, but he is afraid to feel it. She must take care of her own being at this time. She might love him from a distance if she chooses but it is important for her to take care of her own being. It would be ridiculous for me to say to her “stop loving.” That is not possible, but understand that the more you give the more you receive. Tell her to direct her love at herself right now.
Thank you, that’s very clear and helpful I think.